Gettin' Punchy

Oh I couldn't resist that corny title for this blog post.

Yesterday Jennifer and I went out "thrifting" in search of props for the bride-to-be's shower. We are trying to capture the feel of the movie, "Breakfast at Tiffany's". We went to Goodwill and to the Thrift Store and neither place had that perfect black lampshade hat, little black dress, or black gloves that we wanted for the photo shoot. (needed for the invitations) So far we have the pearls and the cigarette holder. These invitations have to be ordered by next week so we can get them out soon.

Anyways...as we were thrifting, I stumbled upon a box down low in the home goods section. This was a box of assorted punch bowl cups...the box was marked 10 cents each. OH HEAVENLY DAY!!!! I spent under $7 for the box. (69 cups to be exact) Unfortunately, I had to spend a good part of this morning pulling off stickers and washing them but what FUN!!!!! They will be a perfect touch to the BRUNCH. Can you just see a lovely "Tiffany Blue" lemonade served in these?

Now I can't wait to go to the other thrift store. This was my first experience at thrifting and I hit the jackpot on the first try!!! I was just thinking how long it would have taken me to search for that many cups...

I spent time with Diane last night discussing our menu plan...Now I'm really getting excited for this shower.

Ash Wednesday

Ashes*
We rise again from ashes,

From the good we've failed to do.

We rise again from ashes,

To create ourselves anew.

If all our world is ashes,

Then must our lives be true,

An offering of ashes,

An offering to you.

We offer you our failures,

We offer you attempts,

The gifts not fully given,

The dreams not fully dreamt,

Give our stumblings direction

Give our visions wider view,

An offering of ashes,

An offering to you.

Then rise again from ashes,

Let healing come to pain,

Though Spring has turned to winter,

And sunshine turned to rain,
The rain we'll use for growing,

And create the world anew,

From an offering of ashes,
An offering to you.

... Thanks be to the Father,
who made us like Himself.
... Thanks be to His Son,
who saved us by His death.
... Thanks be to the Spirit,
who creates the world anew,
From an offering of ashes,
An offering to You.

In Loving Memory of Vickie

Today is Pazcki day! (AKA Fat Tuesday!)

I am not Polish, but my dear sweet neighbor Vickie was. She introduced our family to the tradition of eating Pazcki on "Fat Tuesday". Ever since we first moved into this house (14 years ago) Vickie would send over a dozen or so Pazcki that she lovingly made. Early in the dayVickie would make the dough and would spend the day letting them rise and deep frying the balls of dough in hot grease. Then she would roll them in powdered sugar when they were starting to cool. When my kids would come home from school she would call them over to get their after school "treat". Once a year, my kids would look forward to her yummy pazcki. It became one of our "traditions". Oh how we loved our dear sweet Vickie.

One year, when Vickie was getting up in age (in her mid 90's) I asked her if she was making pazcki on Tuesday and she said she was just too tired to do all the work. I volunteered to come over and make them with her. Actually, what I was doing was asking her to teach me so she could pass the tradition down to someone. Nobody in her family has ever made them. She gave me her recipe and with it, she imparted her pearls of wisdom. We spent the day together laughing and telling stories and baking pazcki, unaware of the 50+ years between us. We were friends; two women with a common interest. We shared a love of cooking, a love of our families, and our love of God.

You see, the following year Vickie was put in a nursing home because her memory began to fail. She could not be trusted to live alone anymore. How it devastated her to leave her home and the routine of cooking her own meals. Slowly, she began to change, as dementia often does. She didn't know she was doing it and it was so out of her character. I couldn't see her like that. I wanted to remember Vickie the way she was all those years we were neighbors...how she was on that day we baked pazcki together. Vickie's laughter resonates loudly in my heart at the very thought of her. Sadly, Vickie passed away on November 3rd, 2008 at the age of 98. Vickie Meleski will live on in our hearts and her pazcki will forever be a family tradition in our home.

...Time to punch down the dough.

The Weekend

We got a snowstorm over the weekend so the hockey game Saturday night was cancelled. No senior night for our boys...hopefully we can reschedule it, although it won't be at our home arena because ice is not available. UGH. The boys were so dissapointed. So they had a two hour practice and had a pizza party afterward. I sure hope Josh still gets to skate one shift. Although I'm not crazy about the idea, I understand why he would want the final experience to be a memorable one.

Saturday morning Jen and I went to Unique Bridal and found THE DRESS. For sure this time...no doubt about it. It is even more beautiful that the one I pictured from David's Bridal. It is an asymmetrical Maggie Sottero gown with a strapless sweetheart neckline embellished with Swarovski crystals, bugle beads, sequins, and seed beads. It has a chapel train and the most beautiful back view with ruching and buttons and detailing. It took her breath away.

I spent the morning "people watching" (it was absolutely claustrophobic in there) and found myself rating dresses on other girls too. I was surprised to see so many girls not embracing the moment...I heard girls saying, "well, this one's okay... put it on my list." Each girl's face did not reflect their excitement or love of the dress. Finally I couldn't help myself... I told one girl, "You have to feel (about the dress) like you feel about the guy you're marrying. You have to be totally IN LOVE WITH THE DRESS!"

Yep, I saw that look on Jen's face when she walked out of the changing room and stood on the platform. She even had butterflies in her stomach. And when she put on the veil...I cried. It must be something about the veil that does a number on a mother. She went from a girl wearing a white princess prom dress to a bride in a wedding gown before my very eyes. Gulp.

The memories that I have from the experiences with my daughters trying on their wedding gowns will be forever emblazoned on my heart. I feel kinda bad Pat didn't get to share it. The memories are priceless... and this is why I blog: To be able to share these memories with my family. To forever capture the feelings and put them into written words. It's my gift to my children.

...Someday they will be reading me my blog for entertainment when I'm in the nursing home, when I've lost my memories. YUCK. scratch that.

Update on dress shopping

Well wedding dress shopping went well the other day. Of course, she made a liar out of me and fell in love with the first dress she tried on. But Jennifer, (being Jennifer) wants to look at another Bridal shop to see if there isn't something else out there she loves more. She wants to make sure she's checked out her options. So we're going Saturday morning to investigate.

In the meantime, plans are underway for the Bridal Shower for Jordanne. We have been busy buying prizes and next week I meet with Diane to discuss our menu plans. I feel so very fortunate and blessed that Diane loves to cook and steps comfortably into the role of caterer. She does it with such flair. We are having a "Breakfast at Tiffany's" themed bridal shower but actually are going more for the "Brunchy luncheon" type menu. I'm trying to really embrace and enjoy these times despite the economic gloom and doom. (in the world and in my checkbook.) We can do it with style without breaking the bank.

My dog was limping this morning. I have absolutely no clue what happened to him. The poor thing is walking around on 3 legs. I have an appointment with the vet in one week. I may have to bump it up sooner if this doesn't get better... gee, wouldn't that be par for the course given our leg injury track record?

Speaking of leg injury...Josh informed me last night that he was going to skate a shift in our last home game. Saturday night is our Senior night and Josh plans to suit up for the game and actually take the faceoff... OH DEAR LORD! He is crazy. CRAZY I SAY! But Pat assured me that he would speak to the other team and explain to them the situation and ask that they not check him. He just wants to skate one shift for old time's sake. It sort of chokes me up to think this is his last home game of his senior year. Gulp. It brings me back to his last home game during football season, recalling how emotional it was for him. He has come so far. He actually seems happy again.

Trying on Wedding dresses

Hmmm...The Duke would look so darned cute in this one.

So today Jen, Jordy, and I are going to try on wedding dresses. *(let me rephrase that: Jen is trying on dresses and Jordy and I are going with her.) Jen is so excited...but I can see this taking a few tries before she finds "THE ONE"...just because Jen is like that. She is very contemplative and calculated and oftentimes indecisive...all rolled into one. (now watch, she'll find the perfect dress on the first try just to make a liar out of me.)

Anyways...I'm just here to say, I'm bringing my own tissue this time. It.makes.me.cry.

I love MONDAYS!

Some more random facts about me:

I LOVE MONDAYS! (Especially SUNNY Mondays!)

Most people I know dread Mondays...it's back to the grind- to work, a return to the mundane, etc. On Mondays I feel like I get a fresh start; a "do-over" if you will. I feel the same way at New Year's and the first day of school.

I know, I know...it's a little weird. Perhaps it's just a game I play in my head to keep my life from becoming stagnant. (Lord knows I need help with that in February.) I guess it's just a part of my Pollyanna perspective on life. I don't beat myself up if I don't achieve all the goals I set for myself each week. If there's one thing I've learned from my near death experience , it's that I really need to start enjoying my life. It's so easy to get caught up in the craziness of it all...the bills, the drama, worrying about my kids, etc.

But we don't get a "DO-OVER" with our lives. So we need to get it right while we got the chance.

I make a conscious effort to treat people how I would like to be treated. I don't put unrealistic expectations on others... this way I am not disappointed if they don't "perform" in the way I "expected" them to perform.

I really have no use for manipulators who try to make a person do something for them by "working their magic". We all know someone who is the master of manipulating... and let me tell you, we've all been sucked into their web a time or two. Many years back I was hurt very deeply by a manipulative friend and I just had to pull away. I gave her the message that I was not going to allow myself to get sucked in with her "conditions of friendship"... the situation took time to heal and has really opened my eyes. Now I have radar that sends up internal red flags when I am in the presence of a manipulative, controlling person. It may take a few red flags for me to realize their gameplan, but once I see it, it disgusts me.

I am a very forgiving person. It's something I actually like about myself. I know forgiveness is a gift and I feel blessed that God has given me that "gift". Sometimes BIG HURTS take awhile to come to forgiveness, but eventually I get there. I always want to believe there is good in everyone. "Father forgive them for they know not what they do"... )Luke 23:34

I would hope that others would be as forgiving to me if I have inadvertantly hurt them. (I could never live with myself if I blatantly hurt someone. I would call them and apologize immediately.)

HOWEVER- there have been instances which I have resorted to the "Mother Bear Mentality". This is not to be confused with the "Over-protective, helicopter-hovering, Micro-managing Mothering Mentality". (gasp!) You know the type...but I'll save that for a future post.

ANYWAYS...Bears usually won't attack humans - but...

get between a mother bear and her cub, and she'll tear right through you. Apparently, the same rules applies to human mothers. Mess with her husband, child, or family, and you are in for a world of hurt. This can be verbally, mentally, emotionally, and physically... I have an extremely protective instinct...and the fact that I've been a mother 5 times only multiplies that instinct.

The best way to survive a mother bear attack?

Quietly move out of its vision and just slowly walk away, never looking back.

Yep, you heard that right.

This way Mother Bear doesn't have to apologize after she rips you limb from limb. (*giggle)

Can you tell I got a dose of my ENDORPHINS and VITAMIN D this morning? I took my morning walk and sat in the sunniest window, soaking up the rays. (Oh how I need a tanning membership in February!) I'm just full of "feel-good" hormones today...

Valentine's Day Randomness

Here's a random piece of information about me:

I LOVE VALENTINE'S DAY!

It's not that I'm some hopeless romantic who pines away the day reading sappy Harlequin romance novels... In fact, I'm not even into reading romance novels...I'm more of a murder mystery/ James Patterson-type... (another random fact) But for some reason, ever since I was a young girl, I have always loved Valentine's Day.

Save the fact that RED is my favorite color. When I was 13 years old we moved into a brand new house. Connie wanted solid RED carpeting. (total 70's) As a matter of fact, I even wanted a red light bulb in my lamp until my dad had to explain to me that RED light bulbs were used in the RED light districts... and when I still didn't "get it" he explained to me that prostitutes worked in the RED light district and a red light in my room really wouldn't give a good message. I think he actually saw the LIGHT BULB go off above my head. To say the least, I was a pretty naive young girl.

Anyways...about Valentine's Day. I think I just really enjoy planning a nice meal to serve my family... I enjoy making heart shaped cut outs and making homemade Valentines. I don't expect anything from Pat. We are just not into commercialized Hallmark holidays... most likely because we are always watching our budget.

So a few days ago I was digging around for a new recipe to make for Valentine's Day. I found the cutest idea HERE:

http://eggsonsunday.wordpress.com/2008/02/14/valentines-treats-chocolate-dipped-chocolate-chip-hearts/

Oh I definitely will be trying this out. Those cookies scream "I LOVE YOU".

Hmmm...how about a heart shaped MEATLOAF? Now there's an idea!

I heard on the radio today that St. Valentine's Day is off the Catholic calendar. In it's place is the feast day of Cyril and Methodius. I wonder what happened that they kicked St. Val off his own holiday? Anyways...I looked these two brothers up and found out that:

Cyril and Methodius believed in the importance of celebrating liturgy in our own language. So apparently these two are the reason why Catholic mass isn't said in Latin anymore.

And now I am armed with Valentine's ideas- all ready for tomorrow's project. Ya gotta love cookin' on Friday the 13th. Good thing I'm not superstitious.

Pondering the Irony of Life

Talking out loud here to myself...

I spent a good part of my day reflecting on the 24 years of my career path. You know, that of parenthood. It was a job I took seriously. "Raising responsible, respectful children into responsible, respectable adults with good moral values" was our MISSION STATMENT.

Over the past few months I've seen a change. Perhaps it's because 4 of our children are now adults. It seems they suddenly have their own lives and their own ideas of how things should go. In a way, this is good. We certainly never aspired to cloning ourselves. As long as they hold firm to the foundation of their value system and and keep their inner convictions, they should go far.

We certainly cannot make their decisions for them. I have seen growth and change in them over the past year. Decisions of manhood and young womanhood that have made me step back and think, "Dang, we've done a pretty good job". They are growing up into fine, respectable citizens.

...But by what measure can we judge our parenting job? How do we know how well we are doing? At what age do we expect them to be there? Are there aptitude tests to take, questionnaires to fill out? Don't we get a report card? Or at least a yearly job review? Certainly our children won't come back and grade us? Sometimes their perceptions are immature and one sided. I wonder if we are judged by our peers? "Oh so and so isn't a very good parent because their kid did --------"? Yikes. I sure hope not. I must admit, I try not to fall into that trap because in an instant it could be our kid messing up and I wouldn't want to be judged. I guess we find out our grade when we meet our MAKER. Gee, I sure hope HE grades on effort and where our hearts lie. And God forbid...I sure hope they eventually "get it".

Besides positive parental influence, what other factors teach our kids how to grow into responsible adults? Hmm...they spend most of their day at school surrounded by their peers. And we already know we can't pick their friends or boyfriends/girlfriends. What are the odds our kids will be attracted to kids with their similar values? We sent our kids to parochial schools. Our thinking was that they would be surrounded by Christian kids in a Christian environment. Uh...well, overall, for the most part we've been happy with our decision and our financial sacrifice but it certainly doesn't keep them in a protective bubble. There are drugs, drinking, sex, and poor values even in Christian schools. Let's just hope we gave them enough godly influence and lived our lives reflecting our moral code.

When they were younger, it seems like we were constantly trying to use bad situations as "teachable moments" and de-programming different ideologies from their impressionable minds. Man, looking back...it's been a l.o.n.g. ride. SHEESH! No wonder I'm tired.

In the "olden days" when a kid turned 18 they couldn't wait to break free from their parents. They couldn't wait to move out into a little dumpy apartment to exercise their own adult freedom. I simply cannot imagine any of my kids being ready for that. (financially or emotionally.)

Have we done a bad job of getting them ready to fly? Have I become a clingy parent who enables their children by serving them plates of food and buttering their bread, by not requiring them to help with the household chores and just allowed them to live without any contribution? Have we gotten so sidetracked with kids sporting events that we got away from doing Saturday chores and lost our sense of TEAM within the confines of our own home? Why does it bother me to no end when I hear them complain about roommates who aren't pulling their weight yet I am living in a home where my "roommates" are doing exactly the same thing?

I'm just askin'... Did we do it wrong?

...so I looked it up. I googled it. and found this:

>>Let's be clear here. It must indeed be the goal of children to live and to make a new home on their own. As the Book of Genesis puts it, "And therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife and be as one flesh." That is the way a person grows up to become a responsible adult.

But with so many more years of formal education needed and with marriage happening at an increasingly later age, it is not necessarily a shirking of responsibility and a desire to remain a child that animates some adult children to temporarily live with their parents.

The question is: How do you know when continuing or returning to live with one's parents is just laziness or a common-sense decision for the time being?

You know by observing what these adult children are doing while at home. Are they partying all night, waking up late in the morning and watching a lot of television? Or are they working hard toward the day they can establish a home of their own?

If it is the former, the parents are merely enablers. If it is the latter, the parents have succeeded both in instilling good values in their child and in becoming their child's friend (which is what the parents of adults should eventually become). And that is something new that, at least in this arena of life, makes these days a lot better than the good old days.<<

Hmmm...something for us all to ponder.

Ham and Lentil soup

Three times this winter I've gotten hams and planned to use the hambone to make stock for a hearty lentil soup. It just never happened. All winter I've longed for the comfort of a thick hearty soup. You know, the kind of soup that warms you down to the bones on a frigid winter day. With fresh home made bread. Mmmm. Well now that the snow is melting and they are calling for mid 40's weather, I finally get around to making my yummy Ham and Lentil soup.

My house smells so yummy. The boys thought I was making bacon for breakfast while the hambone was boiling away. I don't really use a recipe...soup is kind of forgiving like that if you understand the basics of cooking.

Here's what I did:

Boil hambone in a stock pot for a while. (20 minutes or so) Remove hambone and cool. Pick off ham and add to pot. ( toss away bone and fat...duh!)

Add:

2 chopped onions

5-6 ribs of celery chopped

5-6 carrots peeled and sliced
2 crushed cloves of garlic

2 cans of tomatoes (I whiz in food processor because my kids hate chunks of tomatoes)
cups of rinsed lentils
2 cups of frozen swiss chard (optional- I like it for color and added nutrients)
handful of chopped parsley

salt and pepper to taste

Boil away until the lentils thicken and your house smells heavenly.

Serve with yummy home made bread.

Mmmm. Can you just feel the love?

Happy Birthday to my firstborn

(Jen and Jordy in the car on the way to Chicago...I stole this pic from Jordy's blog. Thanks Jord.)

Today is Jennifer's birthday. She's 24 today. She changed my life forever. You see, I grew up in the 70's thinking that women can do anything. We could have it all. (I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan...I am woman, hear me roar, etc.) I thought that I could be a working mom and juggle kids and do it all like Joan Lunden. Except one small detail changed my way of thinking. I fell in love with a sweet little face; and in an instant, my life was changed. Oh sure, I know I could have done it- I know many women who do. I tried it for a year. But I suddenly didn't WANT to do it all. My focus changed. My ideals changed. I wanted to be everything I could be for my family. Thirteen and half months later baby #2 came, and from that day on...It was official: I was a STAY AT HOME MOM.

My adventures of being a SAHM have molded my children and have defined who I am. Perhaps some powerful women might view that as weak and incredibly sad that my children and my role have defined me. I have never regretted my choice of staying home. I have always thought that happiness is internal, not external. I can live with myself and my choices. I know I am an intelligent woman and have used my intelligence to guide my children. I am validated by my peers, my husband, and family...and I will just leave it at that at the risk of sounding like I'm trying to convince myself or anyone else.

ANYWAYS... Happy Birthday, Jennifer. You are a wonderfully, bright, beautiful, and gifted young woman and even more than I could have hoped you would be when I first saw your sweet face.

Now I need to run off to Kroger to buy your angel food cake mix which is your FAVORITE.

Some days you just feel like running away

Watching the news has literally become DEPRESSING. There are so many "agendas" it sickens me to even listen to what is going on. This ridiculous "stimulus package" with all the added political BS attached. Everywhere I go I hear of this store closing and these people being laid off. It hurts my head and I just want to run away.

Yesterday Pat called me with the wonderful news. They are having mandatory one week layoffs. Oh yes, he gets to pick the week. Oh, and they will give him 50% of his wages. Hmmm...which week do I think we can afford to not pay our mortgage payment between now and April? We've got a wedding shower, a graduation, graduation party, our 25th anniversary and a wedding coming up within the next 6 months. I should be excited and thrilled to have so much to look forward to, but instead I see mounting debt and dollar signs. UGH. No wonder I'm depressed.

I have to remind myself that times like these are when we need our faith more than ever. We've been through some pretty rough times over the past 25 years of our marriage. God has gotten us through them, he won't let us down now.

I know one thing: I am so over this winter wonderland thing. We could have a heatwave anyday and melt all this wretched snow. I want sunshine and warmth. NOW!

Man, I sound crabby. I needed to get away from my downer thoughts so last night I ran away. To Sam's Club. With Sheila, my partner in crime. Us girls know how to have a great time. There's nothing like buying a huge pork loin and buns to feed an army of hockey players to get me out of my funk. The retail therapy wasn't quite enough. We needed margaritas... and fried ice cream. And today I feel like pushing the pause button. all. day. I have a splitting headache and I would consider this headache to be the closest thing to a possible hangover I've experienced in YEARS. Half off pitchers of margaritas seemed like such a great idea at the time. Except we forgot to specify half off a HALF pitcher!They were super delicious and by no means did we get tanked... but we both had headaches today. Jimmy Buffet sure knew what he was singing about. The sad thing is...that picture of margaritas just made my mouth water.

Bring on summer!

NATIONAL SIGNING DAY!!

Well, he did it! Josh made a decision to commit to SVSU. They made it official this morning at 7 am by signing their National Letter of Intent. Murphy and Josh were full of Cardinal RED PRIDE. It was a nice little gathering in the gym with the principal, former football coaches, parents, friends, family, and girls. (Murphy's girlfriend was there and Maggie, Justine, and Kelsey came to support Josh.) Coffee, juice, and bagels were served. The photographer and sports writer were there from the Township times. It was an exciting day.

Decisions, Decisions

Oh what's an 18 yr. old boy to do? Northern wowed him with their college presentation, AND they offered him more scholarship money. The only thing is... Northern did not have the course of study that he wants to go into. Josh wants to go into Occupational Therapy and they do not have a pre-OT program. SVSU does. SVSU offered him a nice scholarship package but not as good as NMU. Now what?

The national signing day is February 4th. Both schools need an answer soon because they are sending his National Letter of Intent. It's kind of a big deal with the media and everything. Poor Josh is really having a hard time making the decision...he has to find the right fit. I am praying that God gives him the wisdom to make the best choices for him.