A crazy little note I found today while cleaning...

So despite all my friends and family telling me to "relax and have a nice pampered day on my birthday", I decided to delve into painting my bedroom today instead. I just finished my master bath, so now it's time to give my bedroom that fresh new look it's been needing. (loooong overdue)

While vacuuming up cobwebs and dust bunnies, I decided to clean out my nightstand drawer and came across this folded up letter. It read,



Happy Birthday, Mother!

I'm happy you are alive. Celebrate this day, because you have led such an amazing life thus far. Smart, loving children with good morals, is what you have created. I look at other mothers who nag their children, or don't care at all. Or moms who want to be "cool" moms and try too hard...but you mom, you are PERFECT. You nag me about the important things and you don't have to try to be cool because you already are. You're crazy mom, and sometimes I may give you dirty looks because you act crazy and I'm just being a crab, but you make my day. I'm a brat sometimes, I admit it, but I'm human...I'm not perfect. And I'm sorry.

I love you, Mom. Happy four-one!

P.S. I just want you to know that I love hanging out with you and talking to you about my life.
Love, ???? (you know who you are and you were 17 at the time you wrote it)

Well if that didn't just make my day today... Seven years later, as a newfound "empty nester", I still needed to hear those heartfelt validations. Phew. I didn't plan for a weepy moment in my too tightly overplanned day...
The cobwebs and dust bunnies can wait. I'm takin' a coffee break and putting my feet up for a minute to celebrate 48 years of LIFE.
(who says I'm CRAZY?)

Blogging vacation

Sorry for my absence folks! I've been out livin' life and enjoying my summer. So much has happened this summer from graduating my youngest kid, having a big grad party, celebrating our 27th anniversary, getting a canoe and spending days on the river, getting a new car, going from the fast paced life in Chicago, to a relaxing vacation in Traverse City, thrifting, repurposing,sewing and creating, and as of late, finding ourselves empty nesters.

Jacob moved into the dorms 3 weeks early during football camp and we are suddenly living in a big empty house with our dog. Granted, four of our five kids live within 10 miles of us...but somehow facing the realization that they probably won't be moving back home is a bit...sad.

Before I get too melancholy, I will just say that we are in transition and learning how to adjust to the stillness around here. I guess we are in the late summer of our lives. Can't you hear the high pitched hum of the cicadas?

We're off to visit our mothers in the U.P. for a few days. I'm going to be painting my mom's living room and fluffing her nest. This girl will be back to blogging after Labor Day with lots of pictures to share over our summer.

Peace out 'til then.

MEET THE TWINS!

...And you didn't even know I was expecting...

Their names are Cleo and Fiona. Aren't they purdy? Their big sister Opal was so happy to see how much they look like her.

Okay folks, I'm bein' facetious. But these beauties have been around for a l.o.n.g. time. My mom bought these used when I was a little kid. They were old when she bought them...and now I've had them forever...so they are even older and wiser.

True story...I remember being a kid in our old mining house learning to write my name with one of those f.a.t. kid pencils and pushing so hard that my name was etched in the top of the wood through the paper. (gulp.) My mom was probably not too thrilled.

Anyways...these babies weathered the storm of my childhood and came to me when I was a young mom. They were stained a reddish mahogany and in need of some tlc, although I was not in any mood to sand and strip. I committed the unpardonable sin: I painted the old wood. In the 80's the "country blues" were all the rage. (yes, think geese and ducks.)I kept the tops stained and painted the bottoms navy blue. (see coffee table in the background before it was painted.)They were lovely and stayed that way throughout the years of my children's childhood.

...Until my spring painting frenzy of 2011. I've done my blog research to see what's hot and what's not. I got inspired by Heirloom white and espresso stain and reinvented these girls. (hardware spray painted in oil rubbed bronze.)Ah...I'm in love. They give my living room that Pottery Barn inspired look I'm going for.

Stay tuned for final room photos...
Gotta go watch my baby boy graduate from High School today! Wow, I'm way too young to have 3 college graduates and now TWO in college!

Finding my {re}purpose

The cleaning and painting streak is slowing down now. Yes, I still have a long list of things I want to paint/repurpose/clean. But it's a holiday weekend and we are off to visit family in the U.P. Everyone needs a change of scenery now and then.

This week I changed it up a bit. I had a few requests for cupcake orders. Jordanne and I spent a day making fondant pea pods and royal icing flowers. What fun it was to spend a giggly goofy day with my baby girl, playing with big girl play doh. Then I broke out the kitchen aid and whipped up 6 dozen cupcakes, countless batches of buttercream, and commenced to baking and decorating.


These are the cupcakes Jordanne made for Bradlynn's wedding. Not only can the girl shoot amazing wedding photos, she even brings awesome cupcakes and ends up with a great friend out of the deal. Seriously, these cupcakes are adorable. Jordanne, your creative skills amaze me.

Jennifer's mother in law requested an order of 50 cupcakes for a twin baby shower for her neice. Theme: "TWO PEAS IN A POD" I know Jennifer would have LOVED to be here with us baking and playing but with gas prices the way they are, it's hard to justify another "quick trip" from Chicago. Jen was there with us in spirit.

Needless to say, the cupcakes with two peas in a pod where a huge hit of the shower. (funfetti with buttercream and salted caramel toffee on chocolate.) It was so much fun getting the creative juices flowing. I think the person who most benefitted from this day was me. (I mean this in the humblest way...) I discovered so much about myself through this experience. I'm not sure if I can even express what I'm trying to say without sounding ridiculous...so I will leave it at that.





Anyways... Yesterday I had another cupcake order for a classy bridal shower. Theme: black and white damask with sage green. I decided to embark on a new flavor for my cupcakes: SAMOA cupcakes. (Yes, think Girl Scout Cookies.) mmmm hmmm.

Chocolate cupcake injected with my homemade salted caramel. Topped off with another blob of caramel and toasted coconut. Piped with buttercream and drizzled with homemade chocolate ganache. Can you say HEAVEN? Not gonna lie...I think they were the BEST cupcakes of my life. Then I made raspberry filled yellow cupcakes with cream cheese buttercream and banana cupcakes filled with cream cheese and cream cheese buttercream. They turned out amazing and even I was impressed. The box I found from Walmart made them look so professional. Jennifer sent me a file of a sticker her and Jordanne designed for me and I popped it on that box...Voila- a little side business was born.

I guess I can start taking orders now.

Spring Cleaning is Cathartic

...So yeah, it's been awhile. I've been feeling incredible blogger guilt. Even Pat asked me why I haven't been posting on my blog. Hmmm...I suppose it wouldn't kill me to take a few minutes to throw out some thoughts. I've been so busy throwing out junk and unwanted stuff...

Anyways...as I've been cleaning and purging and painting and fluffing my nest, I've come to realize this thing we call "SPRING CLEANING" is really symbolic of something much deeper than it appears.

Someone asked me why I'm going crazy painting my house for a graduation party. HA. Snap. (I suppose I should start throwing that together one of these days. I mean, it's on my calendar for JUNE 25th...I should really gather my thoughts and pull out my notes from the FOUR PREVIOUS ONES I'VE THROWN...by number five, I should be a pro, don'tcha think?)

Oh yeah, back to the "Painting my house for a graduation party" comment. Um, yeah...Not true. I mean, my graduation parties are outside under a tent and in our garage. I suppose, the food is in my kitchen, and people do come in to use the bathroom...but my bathrooms and my kitchen are not being painted. My point is, I am cleaning and purging and painting and fluffing for an entirely different reason.

You see, spring signifies a fresh start; a chance to remove all the unwanted clutter that has been messing up my mind, body, and soul. It's an opportunity to purge all the unwanted, unneccessary, unproductive garbage in my life.

Clean house, fresh paint, repurposed stuff = clean mind, fresh heart, repurposed life.

This got me thinking...so I googled a bit and found this article: I'm not crazy...someone else thinks like me.


"Many people spring clean their homes. What about our lives? From negative emotions and moods to procrastination and personal tasks not completed, make time to insert a little positive energy into your life. You'll enjoy the person you can be.
Spring Clean Your Life

Our minds are much like our homes. They both get cluttered with old ideas, old attitudes, old conversations, old hurts. Both need a routine cleaning out of stuff that we collected for one reason, and are holding onto out of habit, neglect, or just sheer willfulness.

Pursuing a simple, sustainable, flexible, happier lifestyle means that you have to choose it. And that means choosing to lose some other things. It means getting rid of things that no longer work for you, it means updating the way you do things, it means freeing up some space for new and exciting opportunities and challenges.

Just like cleaning your home, a mental Spring Cleaning takes a dedicated effort, a conscious choice to make changes in your mind the same way you make changes in your décor.

Here are some ideas to get you started on a Spring Cleaning for your Life:

1. Clean out the anger, hatred, jealousy, and self doubt. If you need to apologize, bit the bullet and do it. If you’re still angry and waiting on an apology from someone who won’t or can’t give you one, decide to let it go. It’s not contributing to your life -- in fact it’s contaminating it -- so it needs to go to the junk heap at the curb. Only then can you put something POSITIVE in it’s place. Make some room for happiness.

2. Wash away delay and procrastination. Delay and procrastination set you up for frustration after frustration. You’ll find yourself constantly in the past, trying to catch up, scrambling around trying not to get caught. Is that really how you want to live. Get into the present! You’re missing your life by living yesterday over and over.

3. Dust off your attitude

, and put on a fresh coat of positive. A positive attitude begins with gratitude. For just one day, practice giving instead of taking, practice sharing as much love, help, care, concern, and gratitude as possible. It’ll change your perspective.

4. Throw out misunderstanding, and lack of patience. Sweep out the dirt of gossip or lies. Open the shades and let in the warmth of friendship. True friendships, take work, time, energy, thoughtfulness. True friendships require forgiveness, require understanding. You don’t want to be a doormat to anyone, but you do want to find relationships that are equal and reciprocal. The results are certainly worth it.

5. Lighten up your thoughts with humor and fun. Yes life is difficult and the world can be a scary tiresome place. But in your own world, you are in charge of every day. You decide what to think about. You decide when to laugh, you decide what to read, what to listen to, what to think about. Choose to insert laughter into each day; choose to have a little fun every day.

6. Open the windows of your mind to new ideas and a fresh perspective on living a happier, better, easier life. Change takes action. There’s no silver bullet, no magic pill. But if you’ll open your mind to some different ways of doing things, if you’ll try some new habits, if you’ll work your mind muscles and your organizational skills in a different way, you’ll find that you’ll create the life that you truly want, not just the one that you end up with.

7. Enjoy the person you are. If you don’t like yourself, find out why, and start working on becoming a person you do enjoy and that others will enjoy also. The returns will be worth it."

source: http://www.lifeorganizers.com/cm_articles/92_spring_clean_your_life_735.html

Spring cleanin' and fixin'

...so um, yeah. Been busy these days. The horrible skunk encounter started a cleaning frenzy...(doesn't everything smell better when bleached?)

It took a good week or so to get that smell out of my house (or nostrils). I swear I can still smell skunk when I step out onto the deck. Ugh. Hope that's gone before Jacob's graduation party in June.

Needless to say, I've been in a purging/cleaning/freshening/fixing mood and I started with our sunroom. I should have taken some before pictures. I always forget about doing that for some reason.

I've been shopping inside of my own house. (Taking stuff from other rooms and giving them a new place of importance.)I dunno, it's a cheap way to reinvent my decor. I'm also known as the "huffing queen" since anything can be repurposed with a fresh can of spraypaint. So everything old is new again...at least in my house.

I will start taking pictures to document this disaster area I call home. Hopefully it all comes together and gives me some sense of accomplishment. I really need that right now. Just knowing I can make a change and make a difference is therapeutic for me. Something in my world I can control the outcome of...in the words of Martha Stewart..."it's a good thing."

Random Ramblings

Tonight my dog Duke got sprayed by a skunk again for the second time in his life. Ugh. It's always around midnight or so when he decides he needs to run outside and track down whatever wild thing that just happens to be wandering through our (fenced in?) yard. How on earth we can have bunnies, possums,skunks,racoons, and mallard ducks (in addition to our resident squirrels) when we have a fenced in yard in the middle of the township? Okay, I know they all can climb, fly, or slip in between the narrowest cracks in an old fence...(I did read the tale of Peter Rabbit, ya know)... but I digress.

Needless to say, I was scrubbing my pooch with Dawn dishwashing soap and baking soda at midnight.


Spring where are you? These daffodils from Sheila give me hope for spring...

The panful of paczki I made at 3 am on Fat Tuesday...

Bavarian creme filled...

Raspberry filled...

Ever since we have lived in this house (since February 1995), our next door neighbor Vickie introduced us to the Polish tradition of eating Paczki on Fat Tuesday. (pronounced poonch-key.) That first year, she sent over a plate of the deep fried treats and a tradition was born in our family. Year after year our family looked forward to them...

Until one year Vickie told me she was not going to make them because she was getting too old...You see, she was probably around 96 years old... that day I cleared my calendar and went next door on a mission.

I told Vickie I was her student and she was going to teach me how to make Paczki so I could carry on her tradition. She was so thrilled to have the company and the opportunity to teach a young mother her craft... it was a day I will always cherish. Shortly thereafter she moved into a nursing home and passed away at the age of 98.

Now, every year my kids anticipate the arrival of Lent with the Fat Tuesday tradition of making (and eating) Paczki. I think of that day as I wait for the balls of dough to rise; as I drop them into the hot grease...I remember Vickie in my heart and think how proud she would have been of me.

...the funny thing about traditions is that your kids will hold you to them.

Josh called me and asked me to go with him on his spring break to Chicago. This meant that Tuesday was going to be spent on the train.

"Of course", he said, "you could always make sure you make Paczki on Monday before we leave so I can eat them on the train."

So after I put together all of Jake and Pat's lunches for Tuesday thru Thursday, I dug out my recipe and waited for it to rise...

...and the rest is history.

Oh, and by the way...Chicago was a blast. It was great to spend time with Jen and Patrick and Josh. I came back home with a renewed and rested mind, although it only lasted a day. Pshaw.

Artistic Expression or Do I need to get a life?

It's the month of March...a time for shamrocks and leprechauns...and of course in my little cupcake world, it's time for St. Patty's Day cupcake liners and shamrock sprinkles. It just goes without saying...


But then again...there's an artist inside of me just dying to get out. And since I cannot draw or paint anything other than a wall, I decided to create a crazy cupcake to make Jake and Pat laugh when they open their "cupcake pod" at lunch.


I call it, "Eat your Vegetables"... Don't they look like REAL VEGGIES?


The veggies are actually edible and are made out of fruit tootsie rolls...And this is what you need to do it.

The flavor of cupcake doesn't matter...but just so ya know...this one is a white cupcake with raspberry filling pumped into it. (one of my favorites) Frost the cupcake with a Wilton tip #22. (I just happened to have lime green frosting leftover from a birthday cake I made for a friend this morning.) Anyways...Unwrap a green frootie (toostie roll).With your kitchen scissors, cut halfway down (lengthwise) and then again so you have a green base with four "legs". Gently pull the "legs" apart and separate. With the Wilton tip #22, pipe a round blob of frosting at the tip of each leg. Immediately spoon the dark green sprinkles over the blobs of frosting. Gently place the piece of candy broccoli on the top of the frosted cupcake. Next, unwrap an orange and a yellow frootie. This time cut all the way through lengthwise and once again so you have four pieces. Then cut each piece so they look like carrots and corn pieces. Throw in a few green skittles and voila- you have the sweetest VEGGIES ever...

And before you think, "gosh the girl really needs to get a life...Why on earth would she go through all that bother?"

Don't think I haven't asked myself that very same question on numerous occasions. I've concluded that I am very fortunate to have the opportunity to express my artistic self...thankful that I have people who appreciate the "little things" I do. A husband who has people at work checking out his lunch on a daily basis. (this cracks me up.) Jake's lunch is the topic of conversation at school with his friends and teachers. Daughters who are constantly watching and learning fun things to do with food and using their creative side to make people happy with their many talents. Even though they are all grown men and women...I am still teaching them little life lessons. Thoughtfulness is a gift. Little things matter. Pay it forward.

Peace out.

I just realized I started my day frosting a birthday cake I made for my friend and ended my day baking cupcakes for lunches. hmmm...maybe I DO need to get a life?

something to ponder...

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.
Thomas A. Edison

Valentine's Day part two

...Gotta love my Cricut. I'm just sayin'...
and yes, Jake and Aubrey got theirs earlier. :)

I'm not saying what's in the bags because Jennifer and Patrick's are in the mail and Jordy and Josh haven't come by to pick theirs up yet.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Sometimes I get awesome ideas...but somehow just fall short. I was "concepting" an idea...I made the chocolate dipped oreos on a stick. (easy peasy!) I spelled out "Happy V-Day!" with melted pink chocolate in a Wilton squeeze bottle. The extras were done with squiggles and hearts...But I was out of small cello bags to finish off the project. So off I went to Hobby Lobby. I got home and put the cellophane bags on but soon realized the Valentine's ribbon I bought was way too thick. GRR. Well much to my chagrin, as I was about to assemble the "bouquet" of oreo pops...I realized that someone had eaten the "V" and one of the "P"s. (Paaaaat!)

Anyways...it WAS just a concept....for a future project. If I had been doing it to actually give to someone...I would have spray painted the basket, gotten the EXACT ribbon I wanted, used the perfect color paper shred, and would have spent more attention on how these were artfully arranged. But it was just a conceptual prototype and since a few of my letters were missing...well, there was no use in wasting too much fuss time on it.

Actually, I had found the baskets at Goodwill...they are "Edible Arrangement" baskets that I thrifted for 49cents! I have amassed quite a collection of them for some future projects. (I'm visualizing a fun display at Jake's graduation party. My wheels are turnin' now...)

Needless to say...the gift bags for my kids are made up for Valentine's Day tomorrow. I will save them for tomorrow's post. (sorry Jen and Patrick...yours will be in the mail tomorrow.)

I know I've been severely negligent on my blogposts lately. Blame it on the weather...the winter doldrums, lack of sunshine, etc. Bottom line is that I've been in a funk and I'm trying to shake it. Trying to get my crafty self back in swing.

See you tomorrow!

Fox News induced Nightmares

Let me just preface this story with a brief explanation.

In the summer I NEVER watch TV. But with this blustery winter this year (and the fact that I am in HIBERNATION MODE) I have been watching too much tv. I'll admit, it's usually for background noise...I have way too much A.D.D. to just sit and watch tv. I have to be doing something else while it's on. (Like surfing the web on my laptop, flipping thru a magazine, working on some craft project, folding clothes, etc.) Otherwise my body thinks it's time to sleep. Just watching tv makes me fall asleep. ANYWAYS, I digress...

Which brings me to my story...

My own personal observation and word of warning: Do not fall asleep with the tv on...especially the news. It will make you dream absolutely ridiculous dreams. Now I've fallen asleep watching Discovery Health and dreamt medical dreams all night, or dreamt about having babies (Deliver me), adopting baby a baby from Russia (Adoption Story) I've even had a WEIRD dream involving Emeril Lagasse which I won't go into because I still cannot watch him on the Food Network to this day without blushing...

After Pat and Jake left for hockey practice at 5 am this morning, I turned on the local news to see how many schools were still closed after the STORM OF THE CENTURY. I stayed awake for a while to hear what was happening in the world...from Lindsay Lohan getting caught stealing a necklace to the latest scandal at Planned Parenthood. Somewhere along the way I slipped into dreamland.

Let's see...before I fell asleep last night Ryan was over visiting and I had been texting Jordanne about a cake she made. So obviously these two particular kids were on my mind.

I dreamt that Ryan was in trouble with the law...he and his buddy Pete (who ironically is a cop) had been having a few beers and Ryan got pulled over and was thrown in jail for a D.U.I. (this must have been in between the Lindsay Lohan troubles/ Charlie Sheen rehab part of the news. I was just sick about it...to the point where it woke me right up. While I went to the bathroom I was thankful that it was only a stupid dream...I washed my hands and crawled back into my warm cozy bed.

Of course I needed to purge my brain of this awful dream so I continued watching the news...this time I turned on Fox News...Laura Ingraham was talking about the latest Planned Parenthood debacle...once my brain was purged of my bad dream, I slipped into another dream...

This time I was a worker at Planned Parenthood. I was incognito...an underground reporter working the front desk for incoming counseling needs. My first customer was my own daughter Jordanne. Of course, I was utterly shocked that she would be in such a wretched place. I raised her better than this! I could not blow my cover, so I had to listen to her plea. She told me a horrible story about her awful parents who didn't understand the ways of the modern world...she told me she was pregnant and she thought she should get an abortion because her parents would not understand. She said she really didn't want to get an abortion because she had been raised better than that, but she had taken birth control pills when she was in high school and had taken the RU486 pill once... she decided since she had already had one abortion, why not get another one? GASP!(good Lord, where do dreams like this come from? I swear Satan is working overtime...)

Anyways...I was so devastated in my dream, I had to walk away for a moment in fear I was going to start to cry. I had been hired as this undercover reporter and I could.not.blow.it. After getting my head together, I counseled this young girl and convinced her NOT to get an abortion which is NOT what they do at Planned Parenthood. (Laura Ingraham said PP makes all their money from abortions and did you know OUR TAX DOLLARS support PP? Do we have any say in this?)

Anyways...my boss at PP heard me convince this young girl (my daughter) not to get an abortion (this was my undercover reporting assignment) ...she pulled me aside to reprimand me. (I was miked and wired with a camera...just like they showed on Fox News.) I recorded the entire confrontation...to expose Planned Parenthood. It was breaking news and instead of being happy my mission was accomplished, inside I was just dying a slow death thinking my poor daughter had been led astray and wasn't really who I thought she was. I was crushed. I seriously could cry just thinking about this dream. Needless to say, this is how I awoke this morning and I am just so unbelievably sad as though it really happened. I just want to hug her and have her tell me it wasn't true. This is one of those dreams that will bother me all day.

Moral(s) of the story: Do NOT FALL ASLEEP WATCHING THE NEWS. The world is a messed up place. Satan is a liar and the father of lies. Hang onto the morals and beliefs you were raised with. I feel I need to bless my house with holy water to protect my family from all harm and to spend the day praying for them.

Marinating makes things Tender

Wow. I know the principle works when applied to meat... As a young mother raising five kids, (living on a very tight budget), I learned early on when a cheaper cut of steak is marinated, it becomes very tender.

Today I stumbled upon a TV program that literally marinated my heart...and made it tender.

I love Joyce Meyer...she has such a way of driving.things.home. and filling my heart with overwhelming peace. God has used her to touch many lives throughout the world.

Take a moment to listen to the broadcast I watched today. I've listened to it twice already and it just makes sense. All of it.

Happy New Year!

...so the day before New Year's Eve was spent in the hospital waiting room...Nothing serious, just a "routine" scope surgery performed on Ryan's "good knee". He fell about a month or so ago and he's been having constant pain in it, thought it was a good time to get it fixed. After all the damage he did on the other knee playing rugby, this minor sugery was a piece of cake.

New Year's Eve morning was spent doing hair...then Pat and I went to the casino. This is not something we have ever done before...I have only been gambling once before when we were in Niagara Falls about six or seven years ago. I must say, we had a good time, although I do not like losing, especially losing MONEY. We played the slot machines and they confused me. I had NO idea what I was doing, but at one point I won $50 and quickly lost it all in a few more minutes.

A few hours of that and we both had our fill. The smoke was KILLING ME. I guess the new smoking ban in Michigan does not apply to casinos. ugh.

We went out to dinner and didn't even have to wait very long, considering it was a Friday night. We got back into town around 9:00, and went grocery shopping. Now we really KNOW how to ring in the new year, don't we?

Ryan and his girlfriend were here and we rang in the new year with them. I think we were all were asleep by 12:30. Woo Hoo! What a bunch of party animals.

Life is settling back into a normal routine post holidays...Jen went back to Chicago, Josh was home for a week but went back to the townhomes on campus, Ryan spent a few days here post surgery but is back home now, Pat's back to work, Jake's back to school...Jordy spent some late nights here during Christmas, helping me wrap gifts until 5 am and hanging out with family on Christmas day... It was nice to have everyone home. It really was a wonderful Christmas.

I can only hope and pray that God blesses our family with health and happiness and abounding JOY for the upcoming year. I wasn't sorry to throw last year's calendar away. It was a year with mountains and valleys and a lot of growing pains along the way. I have learned a lot about myself and the people I love, but mostly about the love of God for which I am eternally grateful for. His love has gotten me through the valleys and continues to carry me through the challenging times.

On that note, I will wrap this up so I can get some much needed sleep...something I have been deprived of during the Christmas season.

..."[11]For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. [12] Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. [13] You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart..." Jer.29:11-13