HINT, HINT

Wondering what nice thing you can do for mom today?

Happy Mother's Day!

I talked to my mom yesterday afternoon, telling her the details of our crazy life...being pulled in so many directions, the exciting things going on, the worries over our kids, etc. Even though I totally unloaded on her (and yes, I even cried) I was so humbled to think...at one time I probably made her feel that way (once or twice) during my teen years. So then I told her I'm sorry for everything I ever did to cause her grief and thanked her for being such a great mom...so Mom, if you're reading this...I LOVE YOU MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY! ...and thank you for being such a wonderful role model of motherhood.

I woke up this morning with the sweetest words of appreciation from Pat... telling me how thankful he was to have found such a wonderful woman to be the mother of his children. He brought me in a cup of coffee and then made me breakfast. (anyone who knows him, knows he doesn't cook so this really meant a lot to me.) He put in a load of laundry and told me to go and sit down. What a dear, sweet man I married.

What a rollercoaster of emotions I've been on lately. Do you think it's hormonal? I'm only 44...and I'm NOT PMS right now. I might be asking the doctor about that one. I think I'm just experiencing the realization that my kids are growing up and I have no way to s.l.o.w. things down. So today I'm just going to savor the day...livin' in the moment.

I know it's not a special holiday...but I stuffed a turkey and cooked it up last night. I just happened to have one in the freezer and I had taken it out last week to thaw in the refrigerator. I know Mother's Day is supposed to give Mom a day off, but I just couldn't help myself.

So I'm savoring the moment right now... watching my two grown daughters peeling potatoes and dancing in the kitchen listening to the Jungle Book song. Yes, there is snorting and giggling and very animated faces going on right now... and suddenly they break out into a pom routine. It's gonna be a great day.

Happy Mother's Day!

crazy week

I use this blog to help me sort out the happenings in my life...it chronicles growth. So if you are one of my kids reading this...please see this through my eyes. Humor me, it's Mother's Day weekend.

Let me just say...When one of your children is hurting...you do everything in your power to try and comfort them. There is no love as powerful and moving as a mother's love for her child(ren). That being said...there is also something called "a mother-bear instinct" that illicits the most territorial aggression towards the person who is trying to cause harm... whether it's physical, psychological, or emotional harm. If someone messes with one of my precious litter, I'm ready to pounce.

Teenage hearts and minds are so fragile. They are just experiencing young puppy love. I'm not minimalizing it...but looking back we realize how big it seemed then and how small it is now. Needless to say...We learn from those experiences, we laugh, we cry, we move on...

I just could never understand those girls who always felt the need to control the relationship by telling the guy when (and IF) he could see his friends, when he had to take her places, buy me this, take me here, etc. You know the type...the Jump-to-my- every-whim kind of girls. We had nicknames for guys like that...they were "P.W.'ed" I couldn't stand milk toast guys like that...still can't.

Now of course, I was never that kind of girl...as a matter of fact, I always liked a take -charge kind of guy. Not in an overbearing, controlling kind of way...just a man who knew what he wanted and made a decision. He was very protective of me, cherished me, and provided for me the best he could give. (of course, I'm speaking of the man I married) He continues to be that kind of man...it's a safe, comforting feeling that I cherish. (my dad, by the way, was the same kind of guy.)

We have taught our girls to respect themselves and their boyfriends. We have taught our boys to respect themselves and to respect women. It is our job as parents to point out and guide them, teaching them how to love by being loved, how to have a healthy relationship, by modeling a healthy relationship, how to resolve conflict by how we resolve conflict.

I know for a fact that I do not control my husband, nor do I hit him, play mind games with him...(and vice versa) yet for some reason we started seeing this emerging in a teenage relationship that disturbed us. I watched my son changing before my eyes. A once very sports minded young man now losing all his drive and desire to do the things he once loved to do. He started rearranging his schedule to accommodate more and more time for his girlfriend. It was bizarre coming from him. He had a dream to play college football but no drive to get there. Without going into details...the relationship ended this week. a few times...but it's for the good of both involved. I just hope he finally realizes he deserves to be cherished and not treated like a boy toy, led around and controlled by a girl. It's just not healthy and I wasn't going to sit back and watch it happen to my son.

*Unfortunately sometimes that mother-bear instinct is not appreciated or understood by little bear until little bear is a mother or father bear of their own....do ya know what I mean?

So (gulp) I guess I won't be getting the "Mother of the Year" award this year.

The latest

Well the appointment went well at the U of M this afternoon. The doctor was most impressive and very encouraging regarding Ryan's future in sports. Dr. Sekiya will be doing the very complicated surgery on either Wednesday or Friday of next week. It was a huge weight off our shoulders to hear him being so optimistic and confident on the outcome. I know it was a direct result of God working in this situation.

I just had a long talk with Ryan about how God works in these situations to teach us things, to grow, and learn character building. Ryan said, "but mom, how much can I take? What good is going to come out of this?"

Taken off guard...I just said, "oh, I don't know...maybe you'll meet the woman of your dreams, fall in love, and get married all as a result of this knee injury..." We both had a good chuckle and lightened the mood.

The funny thing is that when we went to eat at Friday's in Brighton our waitress (adorable very personable girl) was obviously flirting with Ryan. Pat told the girl that Ryan was a football player and a recent MSU grad. (total bullshit story) The girl was like, "Really?" Ryan went with the story...

We got to chatting with the girl, she asked where we lived, and she was like, "Ohmygosh!!! I'm moving there this summer because I'm going to the University there!" (same university where my kids really go.) Ironic? (hmmm, just wondering if this was fate?) Who knows...maybe they will meet up on campus some day? Too bad he went with the MSU bullshit story...

anyways...here's Jen's recent progress update:


This is the front of the studio before:

...and this is the studio after a few fresh coats of awning red.

...and this is dear Jen in her "emo" self portrait...being a ham. Oh those artist types.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Well tomorrow Ryan, Pat, and I will be heading to Ann Arbor to see this doctor at the University of Michigan hospital. It seems he has some pretty impressive credentials. (actually the bio only goes up to '06...he is currently practicing at the U of M and comes highly recommended by the knee guru in Pittsburgh.) Ryan is so ready to get this surgery underway. He just finished his last exam today and felt it was most difficult. Let's just hope he did well enough to pass the class.

I'm exhausted in mind and body and the thought of my cozy bed sounds pretty appealing...gonna hit the hay in about 10 minutes.

Duke the Bunny Hunter

How cute is my puppy?

The doctor appointment on Friday has left me feeling uneasy. The orthopedic surgeon (who is an amazing man without a huge ego or God-complex) told us that the complications of this knee injury has made him decide to refer Ryan to a top knee "guru" who deals with these kind of severe sports injuries all the time. He called the Detroit Lions' top docs and they said they refer their complicated knee injuries to some doctor in Pittsburgh. The sports trainer at our doc's office has been making phone calls to the specialists and is dealing with our insurance so we can get Ryan scheduled immediately.

So far I've heard nothing since it's the weekend, but Ryan said they called him and mentioned something about sending him to a doctor (who trained under that Pittsburgh doctor) who works at the U of M hospital. I was not impressed with U of M when I had to go there but then again, I did not see a knee surgeon. I am trying to put it in God's hands but I'm being a worrisome mom again. There's just so much that can go wrong with a surgery like this and it makes.me.sick. when I think about it. I just cannot express how thankful we are that the peroneal nerve is still intact. This could have cost him the use of his leg if it was damaged. Surgery could still damage it and that is a chance we have to take because it has to be repaired it will not heal on its own. I'm just waiting through this weekend to find out when and where the surgery will take place.

In the meantime, I'm trying to busy my mind and body...doing little projects, laundry, cooking, shopping, etc... I am strung as tight as a piano wire. Sometimes gathering information can backfire on you...I did some digging around on the internet and I found more information than I cared to read. It has left me feeling queasy and uneasy. I just have to remember to "plop it in God' s lap".

Okay...so my posts have been beginning to sound like a medical blog...for that I apologize. I'm a mom who worries and as I've said before...Me and God are working on that...

...so I will end this post on a funny dog story.

Today there were several large bunnies hopping around in our back yard. My dog happens to love bunnies because they are just about his size. Well Josh saw the bunnies and decided to let Duke out to have fun chasing them. The bunnies scattered in several directions and found their escape holes in our fence...all but one fat bunny. (must have been pregnant) She got stuck halfway in the escape hole and Duke was biting at her back end and was gnawing on her leg. Josh grabbed the dog and ran in the house to get some wirecutters. He cut the fence so the fat bunny could get through....so the Elvis song has been stuck in my head ever since.

"you ain't nothing but a hound dog, cryin' all the time...you ain't never caught a rabbit and you ain't no friend of mine."

Well folks, Duke is obviously not a hound dog...but I didn't know Lhasa Apsos were hunting dogs.

The Dukester is a bunny hunter.

MRI findings

...well, the MRI showed that he blew EVERYTHING out in his knee except for the PCL and MCL. He will now have to have 2 surgeries to correct all the damage. We meet with the orthopedic surgeon on Friday morning to discuss the course of action, although he called me at home last night to tell me what he found.

There's something called the posterolateral corner which contains seven or eight structures. The surgeon needs to reconstruct this area as well as screw the head of the fibula back on.
These structures are:
1. Fibular collateral ligament
2. Biceps femoris muscle and tendon.
3. Popliteal tendon

He told me there is severe bone bruising along with the head of the fibula being broken off. The ACL is blown out and needs to be repaired also. This will have to be done in the second surgery.They have to stabilize the knee first before repairing the internal part of the knee. He told me his prognosis is pretty good, although rugby, and any contact sports would probably not be in his future.

Please keep him in your prayers. He is pretty bummed out. It's been a rough year for him from severe mono last year at this time, losing a ton of weight, having to gain it all back for football, training to get back in shape for football, then in September making the decision to quit football after all those years of hard work and committment, the emotional loss over that decision...he was just coming out of that funk...having so much fun playing rugby...this was going to be his year to get back on top of things...and now, this.
What's that saying,
"That which does not kill me, makes me stronger."???